Ways to cheer up a family member undergoing harsh cancer treatment?
camizzle asked:
My uncle seems to be always feeling down because he can’t be as active as before. He’s starting to get neuropathy as one of the side effects of his treatment, and he feels useless at times because he can’t help out at home. Any ways to make him feel better?
My uncle seems to be always feeling down because he can’t be as active as before. He’s starting to get neuropathy as one of the side effects of his treatment, and he feels useless at times because he can’t help out at home. Any ways to make him feel better?
Just be there as someone he can talk to. In fact, I doubt your uncle wants “cheering up” - he’ll probably value someone who will listen to him and allow him to get things off his chest than someone who is artificially cheery all the time. Fact is, he’s probably very scared and would just want someone to share that with.
First let me say that you are a wonderful person and your uncle is lucky to have you in his life. You may want to check with his doctor to see if the doctor to see what limitations if any there may be. You may want to start with small things. Perhaps setting the table for dinner or making the morning coffee. Let your uncle work at his own pace. If he wants to do some limited yard work then let him. The key is to always thank him for his help and remind him everyday how much you love him and how important his life is to you.
God Bless You
You need to let your Uncle know that he’s useful for things other than physical.
He is probably a great storehouse of stories about your parent and their childhood. When he’s feeling up to it ask him to reminisce - tape him. Tell him that you’d like the stories for your grandchildren someday. Ask his help in constructing a family tree. Have him tell you what he remembers about each family member.
Ask him for advice or talk out your problems with him. This will make him feel useful and give you a good ear. Make a special date with him to watch a movie. Make it a movie about something relevant to his life - a war movie if he served, a movie with a plot that intersects with some interest of his. Then, after, ask him if he will tell you about his experiences.
Read the same book together. Or, listen to it on tape and discuss it. If he’s a do-it-your-self-er, get “This Old House” DVDs and watch them with him.
Basically, spend time with him and let him know that you value that time. Try to tailor that time so that he’s able to feel that he’s able to impart wisdom and information so that he feels useful.